Parents are discovering the reality of “gramnesia,” a phenomenon created online where some grandparents seem to forget what it’s like to raise babies and toddlers.
In a Reddit thread that has garnered thousands of comments, one parent asked, “How are we alive!? Our parents can’t parent!”
Since having children, they said they haven’t come across a single set of grandparents who “know anything about children.”
First, they explained that their mom didn’t know how to tell if a diaper was small. They also claimed that she gave their son “a large plastic bag and encouraged him to put it on his head.”
Their father, meanwhile, kept his son until he was 12 months old. “I wouldn’t trust him to watch my son if my house was on fire and I had to put him out,” the parent added.
And their in-laws also seem to struggle with remembering how to take care of their children. “My mother-in-law was terrified that my son had the hiccups, she didn’t know what it was or what to do! She keeps trying to change his diaper once an hour,” said the parent.
“My mother-in-law keeps giving my son piping hot food, despite me telling him to wait for it to cool or blow on it or something other than stuff it in his mouth!”
“I know they didn’t have the internet, but damn,” they continued. “The hardest part of raising kids is the babysitter. They act like they’re coming over, they’re helpful, it’s just more work and stress for me.”
Needless to say, there were some other worried parents [mother-in-law] How hard it was to go to appointments or do anything for myself, with a velcro baby stuck to me 24/7, she told me to just leave the baby at home. ‘He’ll be safe in his crib. You’ll be gone for an hour or two. What could happen?'”
Another said: “My MIL gave my 4m old coffee while they were hooked up to hospital monitors. It could always be worse.”
“My 9-month-old was weaned off formula, my dad said he was feeding him ice cream (his argument is that it’s milk),” added another respondent.
One offered: “My father-in-law once offered to drive my 9-month-old home after he and my MIL had her for the day. I pointed out that he didn’t have a car seat to drive her in! Then he said, “Oh, I’ll just put the portable high chair in the back seat and put it through that.” What???!”
Most people agreed that over time, people simply forget how to care for young children (I can definitely relate – after my second birth, it was like I had forgotten how to even hold a newborn).
“It’s like they forget. My mother-in-law ran a daycare. But to see her trying to do something with a child now? Forget about it,” said one commenter.
“Speaking of my parents, they both ask to change their diapers, and my stepmom always asks which way is back and which is front, even though the diaper has the word ‘front’ printed on it.”
Even parents with older children said they had already forgotten how to do half of the tasks required to look after babies.
One said: “I have 4 kids. I have forgotten every milestone and by far. It was 9 years ago when my youngest was born. I have no idea how to take care of a baby lol (that’s hyperbole but..), I was also sleep deprived and overwhelmed.”
So it seems like a certain amount of patience is owed to our generation of parents, but if they try to give your baby coffee, there’s definitely a word to be said.
